(Most recent picture I have of the 3 of us... not MY best...BIG BELLY!)...Soon to be family of 4!!! I cannot believe that I am just days away from having my new little baby boy, and that my small little family of three will become a family of four! We are so excited to welcome this new little bundle and take this next step in our family. We know that Heavenly Father has a plan for our little family and that this baby, although a surprise to us... is part of his plan as well. Shad and I are so blessed to be parents to TWO little boys! We are so lucky and excited for this new chapter.
That being said... a part of me really can't help but mourn the end to my perfect little family of 3! The moment I found out I was pregnant with baby number two, I knew that suddenly my days of just Owen and I were numbered. I have enjoyed being a mother to him so much, he is just my perfect little man. We have been BEST BUDS since the day he was born and he continues to remain my little momma's boy and best little helper. I have had two years with him, where most days it has just been the two of us hanging out. Two years of me just belonging to him... just a mommy to Owen. They have been the most challenging and emotional two years of my life! But they have also been the most rewarding and wonderful two years. This baby can truly come any day now (although I have a feeling it will be later rather than sooner... ugh!), I have relished in the last few days that it will just be me and Owen and the time I get to spend with him. We have spent hours upon hours playing in his room with cars, trucks, and puzzles. He backs up into my lap and asks me to read books upon books to him, and I find it impossible to say no. He melts my heart whenever I hear him call "Hi Mommy..." or "Mommy where are you!?" I've been standing outside his room and listening to him read his many books to himself or play trains. I rocked and sang to him until he fell asleep in my arms for his nap today. Its little moments like this that make me wonder how much will change when baby #2 comes?
Being a mother has taught me so much about myself and about the truthfulness of the gospel. These last two years have truly opened up my eyes to our Heavenly Father's eternal plan for us and how families really are the biggest part of his plan. I always knew that I wanted to be a mother, but after having Owen I have never realized how much I was missing and how much I really wanted to be a mother until then. I never truly understood the meaning of unconditional love... and have just a tiny glimpse of how our Heavenly Father can love each of us. Today I was looking on people.com (Yes, I do read People.com semi-regularly... go ahead and judge me!), and there were comments on a story that somehow lead to people talking/discussing the Mormon religion. People were criticizing and writing comments how we have been brainwashed since birth to dress modestly, get married young, have babies and families because we don't know any better... etc. Besides laughing off their complete ignorance, I cannot help but feel sorry for these people who don't have the truth. Because raising a family and being a mother and wife is the greatest happiness and joy I will ever know!
Owen is the love of my life. I am so beyond blessed with such a perfect family. I don't know what I did deserve such happiness. Being a mother of two scares me to death! Will I have enough love and enough of me to go around? Will I be able to have TWO best little buddies that follow me around all day and make my heart swell with so much joy and love its overwhelming? Its hard to imagine... but I'm excited to find out! I know its going to be hard, challenging, and there will be some days where I wonder how I will survive. But I also know that there will be no greater love in my life than that of motherhood and family.
So here's to hoping he comes ANY DAY NOW... because I am SO over being pregnant! This is officially the most pregnant I have ever been... Owen was 10 days early, and I am now past that point with this one, and still feel like it will be while!
That being said... a part of me really can't help but mourn the end to my perfect little family of 3! The moment I found out I was pregnant with baby number two, I knew that suddenly my days of just Owen and I were numbered. I have enjoyed being a mother to him so much, he is just my perfect little man. We have been BEST BUDS since the day he was born and he continues to remain my little momma's boy and best little helper. I have had two years with him, where most days it has just been the two of us hanging out. Two years of me just belonging to him... just a mommy to Owen. They have been the most challenging and emotional two years of my life! But they have also been the most rewarding and wonderful two years. This baby can truly come any day now (although I have a feeling it will be later rather than sooner... ugh!), I have relished in the last few days that it will just be me and Owen and the time I get to spend with him. We have spent hours upon hours playing in his room with cars, trucks, and puzzles. He backs up into my lap and asks me to read books upon books to him, and I find it impossible to say no. He melts my heart whenever I hear him call "Hi Mommy..." or "Mommy where are you!?" I've been standing outside his room and listening to him read his many books to himself or play trains. I rocked and sang to him until he fell asleep in my arms for his nap today. Its little moments like this that make me wonder how much will change when baby #2 comes?
Being a mother has taught me so much about myself and about the truthfulness of the gospel. These last two years have truly opened up my eyes to our Heavenly Father's eternal plan for us and how families really are the biggest part of his plan. I always knew that I wanted to be a mother, but after having Owen I have never realized how much I was missing and how much I really wanted to be a mother until then. I never truly understood the meaning of unconditional love... and have just a tiny glimpse of how our Heavenly Father can love each of us. Today I was looking on people.com (Yes, I do read People.com semi-regularly... go ahead and judge me!), and there were comments on a story that somehow lead to people talking/discussing the Mormon religion. People were criticizing and writing comments how we have been brainwashed since birth to dress modestly, get married young, have babies and families because we don't know any better... etc. Besides laughing off their complete ignorance, I cannot help but feel sorry for these people who don't have the truth. Because raising a family and being a mother and wife is the greatest happiness and joy I will ever know!
Owen is the love of my life. I am so beyond blessed with such a perfect family. I don't know what I did deserve such happiness. Being a mother of two scares me to death! Will I have enough love and enough of me to go around? Will I be able to have TWO best little buddies that follow me around all day and make my heart swell with so much joy and love its overwhelming? Its hard to imagine... but I'm excited to find out! I know its going to be hard, challenging, and there will be some days where I wonder how I will survive. But I also know that there will be no greater love in my life than that of motherhood and family.
So here's to hoping he comes ANY DAY NOW... because I am SO over being pregnant! This is officially the most pregnant I have ever been... Owen was 10 days early, and I am now past that point with this one, and still feel like it will be while!
5 comments:
I can't believe it's that close to having another little boy in your family! How exciting! As I was reading your post, I just wanted to stand up and say "AMEN!" to all that you were saying. Being a mother really is such a great Joy...and I had no idea until I became a mother. Having children takes a lot of faith, but I think can show some of his GREATEST tender mercies through children. Can't wait to see your next lil' guy!!!
And I can't believe that Owen is two already. It really does go by that quickly. I heard from one of the Moms of two around here that the second one is a much easier transition than the first one, you already know how to be Mom you just got to figure out Mom of two now. Plus once they play together, fabulous! I loved when Charly was able to play with her cousins and I could enjoy grown up time again.
I just gushed when I read this because I love hearing your sentiments on motherhood. I am so excited for you and love your little soon-to-be-family-of-four as well!
I'm excited to meet your new little boy! You make me laugh :) I remember you telling me when you were pregnant with Owen, that you were excited to have a baby but were going to be sad it wasn't just you and Shad anymore. you are funny :)
Thanks for your testimony on Motherhood. I agree 100%!
I hope that things are going well. I saw on FB that you have had baby number two and can't wait to see pictures and have updates on how things are going!
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